Defeated

I’m currently feeling 
Defeated.

My thoughts creating this feeling:
Didn’t have a lunchtime walk yesterday as it was raining. Didn’t do a JWW when I got have because C had an early meeting which meant an early dinner, and to be honest, I’d kind of already talked myself out of doing one anyway by the time I got home. I flopped for the evening. C’s meeting started at 7pm and by 7.30pm I was asleep. I slept until he came back in the room, then after about an hour, slept again until bedtime, then slept all through the night. I need to break the habit of after dinner naps and do something more constructive. I did try to read at first but found my eyes were getting dry and tired so had to stop. I don’t want to be spending that time doom scrolling social media. If I have meetings in the diary I’m usually fine to plow through til bedtime.

My extraordinary goal for the year is…
To be more financially savvy and understand my pensions, savings and investments more to enable me to take early retirement in 2026 and live a luxurious life.

What result will I produce this month?
I have transferred £5,000 to a higher interest paying savings account. I am going to try not to spend any money on Googleplay this month.

My tasks for the day is…
C wants to go check the bells over before tomorrow’s peal attempt so I have to go along for safety reasons. I’d read, definitely workout, and maybe do some SOSI work.

What thoughts are holding me back? 
I won’t have anything to do whilst C is checking the bells as I don’t like climbing that frame and don’t feel safe. I’d literally just be standing at the door staring into space. And he’ll take longer than he says he will. He always does.

What thought will I practice instead?
I’ll have the rest of the day to do what I want and can do as much, or as little as I like. I do feel I need to move my body more.

What can I remove, elevate, upgrade or add to my style to embody my future self?
Black jeans, nordic style jumper. Gibraltar bracelet, birthstones necklace, V&A rectangle earrings. Cozy and demure.

What can I remove, elevate, upgrade or add to align with my future self’s environment?
Focus on self care. Listen to my body and move it. Feed my brain and take in new, useful information to support my EG and WOTY.

What am I excited to practice and improve?
Movement. Get my body moving so it’s stronger, leaner, fitter and sexier.

My progress and my blessings
I had a rest day yesterday. Today I have time and space to move.

What do I declare myself to be today?
Moving.

What questions can I ask of myself today?
How can I identify what I want in my future and how to make it happen?

What words of encouragement, insight, wisdom or humour does my future self have for me today?
Get up off my fat, lazy arse and move.