Contemplative

My current feeling:
Contemplative.

My current thoughts are:
Yesterday we were ringing in a competition is Epsom. We were drawn last so had a lot of hanging about to do. I did get a chance to chat with a few familiar faces. The food options weren’t great, and I’d started the day out well by an on plan breakfast before our journey. From then on in it was bacon butties and cake. As we were the last team to ring, it meant we didn’t get lunch until very late, after the results, and indeed after the nearest pub had stopped serving food. A group of us found another pub a few streets away. We’d comfortably won the competition so had to carry the huge trophy to the pub and then all the way back to where the car was parked. At the pub we were discussing the competition ringing and I said that I couldn’t hear my bell at all particularly when I was ringing between the two back bells. Someone on the other table said he couldn’t hear me either “for once”. A few people laughed. I raised an eyebrow and said “ok then, noted”. I stayed quiet for the next 10 mins. He did half- heartedly apologise and shook it off as “only joking”. I spent the rest of the time in the pub a lot quieter, and the whole journey contemplated what was meant by it. I was less than elegant in my response, actually holding up two fingers at him. I was almost going to send an apology message for the way I’d responded, but didn’t. He’s probably forgotten all about instantly while I’m still ruminating on it the next day.

My physical state is:
Needy.

My physical state is a result of:
I need to move. I was getting stiff yesterday only sitting in a car or a church, a pub or at home.

I will make today extraordinary by:
1) Ringing this morning and a walk into town and back.
2) Investigate Netflix and other streaming service bundles.
3) New cycle food prep for the week ahead.

My desired emotion for today is:
Renewed.

I am a woman who:
can let go and move on.

Today I will let go of:
Mysogyiny.

Today I choose to add:
Success.

My wins, accomplishments, gratitudes for today:
I checked into Advanced Cycle 12 yesterday.

The thoughts that support my celebrations:
Lost another lb and a few cms here and there, so over all pleased. Looking forward to starting this cycle’s workouts and food choices. Will be prepping food later today.

I want to improve the following for tomorrow:
Response times. To emails. To things I should have said at the time but only thought about after the event. To activities I want or don’t want to do.

Words of advice, wisdom, encouragement, humour from my future self:
Calling out gaslightlighting and mysoginy whenever I see it